Couples in places like Frisco, Lewisville, and the rest of Denton and Collin County don’t usually come into my office saying, “We’re divorcing because of a thousand tiny choices we ignored.” They point to one affair, one blow‑up argument, or one moment when someone finally walked out. But one of America’s most‑quoted divorce lawyers, James Sexton, argues that for roughly half the divorces he sees, the real cause is something quieter he calls “slippage.”
In a recent interview that went viral, Sexton describes slippage as the gradual build‑up of “small disconnections” that individually seem harmless; missed conversations, lingering resentments, time spent on phones instead of each other; until the relationship finally collapses under the weight of years of distance.
What “slippage” looks like in Denton and Collin County marriages
Sexton’s basic point is simple: at the beginning of a relationship, finding and keeping “the one” is a huge priority, so you pour time, energy, and attention into your partner. As life in the North Dallas suburbs settles in; kids in travel sports, demanding careers in the Plano–Frisco–Legacy corridor, long commutes down the Tollway; and, other routine, non-romantic tasks take our time and attention; that focus quietly shifts to everything else.
Slippage usually shows up as:
- Short, transactional conversations about logistics instead of real connection.
- Less intentional time together and more separate routines, especially in households where one or both spouses have high‑stress jobs.
- Avoiding difficult topics “to keep the peace,” even when something is really bothering you.
Because we all dislike temporary discomfort, and many people secretly believe “love should be easy,” couples don’t talk about these small hurts. Over years, that avoidance creates a gap that feels impossible to close.
Is it true that 50% of marriages end in divorce?
Headlines love to repeat that “half of all marriages end in divorce,” and Sexton calls that a “frightening statistic.” The reality, both statewide and here in Denton/Collin Counties, is more nuanced.
Recent data suggest that nationwide divorce rates have fallen from their peak and are now often estimated closer to around 40% of marriages, not a clean 50%. The old “50%” number came from crude comparisons of marriages and divorces in a single year, not from tracking real couples over time, which tends to overstate the actual lifetime risk.
In North Texas, Denton and Collin counties reflect these complexities. Analyses place their overall divorce rates in roughly the same band as Dallas County; and, in Denton County, nearly half of divorces involve minor children. So no, marriage is not a coin‑flip, but for a meaningful number of families in this region, divorce is a real outcome, especially where high stress, high income, and long‑term slippage collide.
Why slippage is common in Frisco, The Colony, Little Elm, Lewisville, and Flower Mound
The North Dallas suburbs are full of families who look “successful” on paper: high median household incomes in growing areas of Denton and Collin County; a growing number of high‑earning households in those counties; and fast‑growing, young, professional populations across both counties. That success often comes with demanding jobs, travel, long hours, and packed kid schedules.
From a divorce‑court vantage point, that environment tends to produce:
- Dual‑career couples who have slipped into living parallel lives instead of shared ones.
- Tension over money and lifestyle, even in high‑income homes, as expectations rise with income.
- A sense that there is no time or emotional energy left for the marriage until something finally breaks.
In other words, slippage isn’t about one big betrayal in many of these North Dallas cases—it is the quiet erosion that happens when careers, kids, and screens consistently come first.
What “slippage” means for high‑asset couples in Denton and Collin County
For high‑asset couples in Denton County and Collin County, slippage doesn’t just threaten the relationship; it can dramatically affect how a future divorce unfolds. Under Texas community‑property principles, all property acquired during the marriage is presumed to be community, and high‑end assets such as businesses, investment portfolios, real estate holdings, stock options, and retirement accounts may be complicated to characterize, and divide; especially when there has been a commingling of funds, or payment to or from one or both Separate Property Estates, and the Community Property Estate. When spouses live increasingly separate lives for years, they may make major financial decisions without transparency, leading to disputes over valuation, separate vs. community property, and even allegations of waste or hidden assets once divorce is filed.
In suburbs like Frisco and Lewisville, where many families have substantial incomes and complex asset structures, the slow drift of slippage can mean key accounts, business interests, or trusts are managed by one spouse with little input from the other. By the time the marriage ends, the less‑involved spouse may feel blindsided; not just emotionally, but also financially; because they never received full information or were gradually excluded from financial decision‑making as the relationship deteriorated.
Slippage and parents with minor children
For parents with minor children, slippage has a second layer of impact: the way kids experience the breakdown of the marriage. In Denton and Collin counties, a large share of divorces involve minor children, which means custody and parenting‑time issues are front and center in many cases. When parents drift into parallel lives, kids often pick up on the emotional distance long before any papers are filed—through tension at home, lack of shared family time, or parents who function more like roommates than partners.
If the marriage does end, that history of slippage can influence how each parent approaches co‑parenting. A parent who has been less involved in day‑to‑day life—missing school events, medical appointments, or extracurriculars during the years of marital drift—may start a custody case at a disadvantage when a court evaluates each parent’s past involvement and ability to provide a stable, nurturing environment. On the other hand, the parent who has carried most of the emotional and practical load may be exhausted and more susceptible to high‑conflict patterns during litigation, which judges also weigh when determining what is truly in the child’s best interests.
How slippage plays out in a high‑asset Texas divorce
In a high‑asset Texas divorce, slippage tends to magnify three big issues: characterization of property, valuation of complex assets, and long‑term financial security for both spouses.
Texas courts first determine which assets are separate and which are community, then divide the community estate in a “just and right” manner. For high‑net‑worth couples in places like Frisco, Little Em, The Colony, Lewisville, Lantana, Highland Village, Flower Mound, and the broader Denton/Collin area, that often includes businesses, professional practices, stock plans, real estate portfolios, and significant retirement or investment accounts.
When a marriage has been slipping for years, it is common to see:
- One spouse in effective control of financial information and decision‑making.
- Commingling of separate and community funds without clear documentation.
- A lack of shared goals around saving, spending, or succession planning.
All of this can create fertile ground for disputes over whether certain assets are truly separate, whether one spouse dissipated or concealed community assets, and what a fair overall division looks like in light of each spouse’s earning capacity and future needs. Slippage doesn’t change the black‑letter law, but it heavily shapes the factual story judges and mediators hear about how the estate was built and who contributed what over time.
How slippage affects custody disputes in high‑asset cases
In custody disputes—including those arising from high‑asset divorces, Texas courts must base conservatorship and possession decisions on the child’s best interests. That includes factors such as each parent’s history of involvement, their ability to provide a stable home, and their willingness to support the child’s relationship with the other parent. In high‑asset cases, the child’s lifestyle and opportunities can also become part of the analysis, particularly when there are large income disparities between parents or when one parent’s work and travel demands limit day‑to‑day availability.
Years of marital slippage often leave a practical trail that matters in litigation: calendars showing who took kids to appointments and activities, school and medical records listing a primary contact, and digital communications documenting who handled homework, teacher meetings, and discipline. Judges in Denton and Collin counties tend to look at patterns, not just promises, so a parent who has gradually stepped back from parenting during the marriage will face an uphill battle arguing for primary custody after separation, especially if the other parent has been the consistent day‑to‑day caregiver. At the same time, the emotional strain of slippage can push parents into high‑conflict behavior—interference with visitation, hostile communication, or involving children in adult disputes—which can damage their credibility and harm their custody position.
Early warning signs you should not ignore
If you live in Denton or Collin County and recognize yourself here, the early warning signs of slippage are worth paying attention to. Those signs often include:
- Talking more about schedules, carpools, and bills than about each other’s inner lives.
- Spending most of your downtime in separate rooms, on separate devices, without much shared experience.
- Avoiding bringing up hard topics because “it will just start a fight,” so resentments quietly pile up.
Sexton’s metaphor is that “no single raindrop is responsible for the flood,” and that is exactly how many Frisco and Lewisville clients describe their marriages when they finally sit down with a lawyer: nothing catastrophic, just years of feeling unseen and unheard.
Can you stop slippage before it becomes a divorce?
Often, yes—if both spouses are willing to notice it and do some uncomfortable work (Most people go to therapy wanting to justify their behaviors and attitudes, rather than make significant changes in their own attitudes and behaviors; so, therapy does not work for them). Therapists and relationship experts frequently recommend:
- Regular, scheduled check‑ins to talk about how each of you is really doing, not just about work and kids.
- Protecting time for connection—date nights, shared hobbies, even a daily 10–15 minute “screen‑free” conversation.
- Being honest about resentment and fear early, instead of waiting until you are emotionally checked out.
These habits don’t guarantee that a marriage will survive, and some relationships should not continue, especially where there is abuse, or when one spouse has an Avoidant Attachment Style, where they become anxious when their partner tries to get emotionally close to them. But those efforts directly counter the passive drift that fills Denton and Collin County court dockets year after year, in marriages without abuse, and when both spouses have a Secure Attachment Style.
When slippage has already become a chasm
By the time some people call a lawyer, slippage has been happening for years. One spouse has been emotionally gone for a long time; the other is just now realizing the depth of the distance.
At that stage, the legal process in Denton County or Collin County courts has to focus on:
- Protecting children, who are involved in a large share of local divorces.
- Dividing property, retirement, and business interests built over years of hard work in North Dallas’s booming economy.
Understanding the pattern that brought you here doesn’t magically save the marriage, but it can help you make calmer, more strategic decisions about custody, support, and long‑term financial security.
What to do if this sounds like your marriage
If you see slippage in your own relationship, you have options. For some couples, the right first step is a counselor, pastor, or therapist—not a lawyer. Honest conversations and professional help can sometimes repair a relationship before it crosses a point of no return.
If you are already at the point where separation or divorce is on the table, talking with an experienced Denton or Collin County family law attorney can at least help you understand what the process would look like, how your children and property would likely be affected, and what steps you can take now to protect yourself.