Lewisville Attorney Guiding You Through Common Custody Mistakes
Child custody and conservatorship cases are among the most serious matters heard by Texas courts, and the outcome can shape your child's life for years. Yet, many parents unintentionally sabotage their own Texas child custody cases with avoidable choices, even after investing substantial time and money in attorneys, evaluators, and other professionals. On top of that fact, significant 2025 changes to the Texas Family Code have altered how courts evaluate custody, visitation, and parental conduct; so, missteps now carry even greater risk.
This guide explains the most common mistakes Texas parents make in custody disputes today, and how to avoid them so you can better protect your relationship with your children. Working with an experienced Texas child custody lawyer can also help you avoid these mistakes and navigate the process more confidently.
For more information from Heiman Law Firm or to get started on your free consultation, call (469) 384-7303 or contact us online.
1. Posting harmful content on social media
Modern Texas custody cases are often impacted by screenshots. Photos or posts showing you intoxicated, using drugs, violating court orders, bad mouthing the other parent, or engaging in other unflattering behavior can be used as evidence against you.
If you are involved in a divorce or contested child custody case, assume that anything you post, or allow others to tag you in, could be entered into evidence. These posts can be damaging and can affect possession and access decisions under Texas Family Code Chapter 153's 'best interest' standard (the court's decisions regarding children are made in the best interest of the child or children). Assume that if it is posted online, it may end up being evidence in your case.
2. Keeping your lawyer in the dark
Your attorney can only protect you from what he or she knows about. When clients hide or minimize important facts, they make it almost impossible for their lawyer to prepare a smart strategy in a custody case.
Your lawyer needs full, honest information about your background, your parenting, and any past mistakes from your past or present (all the way until your decree or order is signed by the judge) that relate in any way to your fitness as a parent. This can be embarrassing, but if something might arise in court, your attorney needs to know about it in order to plan on how best to address it. That is difficult to do if your attorney learns about a problem for the first time in the courtroom.
3. Dragging your children into adult conflict
Parents rarely set out to harm their children, but many underestimate the damage caused by involving kids in adult conflict. Venting about the case or the other parent in front of your children forces them to take sides, whether they want to or not.
This can take several forms:
- Bad mouthing the other parent or that parent's family in front of your child.
- Oversharing adult details about legal filings, infidelity, finances, or intimate conflict.
- Asking your child to take messages back and forth, or to 'report' on what happens at the other parent's home.
Calling your co-parent names, questioning their character, or criticizing their family in front of your child is emotionally abusive, even if you believe every word is true. Your child experiences those comments as attacks on a person they love, which can create confusion, guilt, and long-term emotional issues. Please don't do this to your child(ren).
Mental health professionals agree that when children are exposed to ongoing parental conflict and unstable home environments, they often develop emotional and psychological symptoms similar to those seen in children who have suffered physical abuse—something Texas judges take very seriously in child custody cases.
Some parents justify telling children 'everything' because the child asks or says they 'have a right to know.' But exposing children to adult information puts emotional weight on them that they are not equipped to carry. Being a good parent often means protecting your child from information that may be technically accurate ('true') but emotionally harmful.
Children should not be used as messengers or spies. Sending messages through your child or interrogating them after every visit teaches them that they cannot relax or be fully themselves in either home and pressures them to take sides. Courts often view repeated questioning and recruiting children to 'report' on the other parent as harmful behavior that suggests the parent is not truly focused on the child's best interest.
Under the Texas Family Code, courts must always consider the child's best interest, and a pattern of trying to turn a child against the other parent, or pulling them into adult conflict, can lead to restricted rights, supervised visitation, or a change of primary custody. Judges in Texas child custody cases, including in Denton County and Collin County, pay close attention to which parent shields the child from conflict and which parent exposes them to it.
4. Turning conflict into legal trouble
When parental conflict crosses certain lines, it can trigger legal consequences beyond the custody case itself. Involving your child in the dispute, threatening the other parent, or engaging in severe emotional abuse can lead to a Child Protective Services (CPS) investigation. CPS may require services, restrict access, or in extreme cases, remove children from a parent's care.
Recent changes to Texas law have increased judicial focus on family violence and emotional harm, so courts are less inclined to overlook patterns of intimidation or emotional abuse. Many courts view repeated emotional harm as seriously as physical aggression and may intervene to protect the child from continued exposure. These issues can dramatically affect conservatorship and possession orders in Texas child custody cases. A parent who allows conflict to escalate into threats, stalking, harassment, or serious emotional abuse risks not only CPS involvement but also protective orders, contempt findings, and reduced parenting time
5. Refusing to cooperate on reasonable parenting issues
Flatly refusing to accommodate reasonable requests, such as switching weekends for a school event or family wedding, can backfire. Courts recognize that life happens, and expect parents to show flexibility when it serves the child.
Texas courts increasingly look for evidence that each parent can co-parent, share information, and support the child's relationship with the other parent, especially as Expanded Standard Possession Orders (ESPOs) become more common. A parent who consistently refuses to cooperate may find the court awarding more decision-making authority or time to the more flexible, child-focused parent.
In practice, this means that saying no out of spite, rather than because of a genuine scheduling or safety concern, can hurt you. Judges in Denton County, Collin County, and across North Texas often pay close attention to which parent appears more willing to work together for the child's benefit.
6. Normalizing unsafe or unhealthy behavior
Children learn far more from what you do than from what you say. Drinking to excess, driving after drinking, using illegal drugs, or engaging in reckless behavior in your child's presence, or even where they are just aware of it, sends a message about what is 'normal' and acceptable.
As more cases move toward near equal parenting time when it is safe to do so, credible evidence of substance abuse or persistent unsafe behavior can lead a judge to reduce or supervise your time, and even require an alcohol monitoring device as a condition of access to your child(ren). Courts will adjust possession and conservatorship to protect children from environments they view as unstable or dangerous in Texas child custody cases. If you want to be viewed as the safer, more stable parent, your behavior must reflect that consistently—at home, in public, and online.
7. Mishandling a new romantic relationship
New relationships after separation are common and normal, but how you handle them can have major consequences in a custody case. Introducing your child to a new partner too quickly, demonstrating a stream of short-term partners, or exposing your child to unhealthy dynamics can cause both immediate emotional harm and long-term trust issues.
While recent Texas Family Code changes have tightened standing rules for many non-parents, including some step-parents, courts remain focused on whether your choices around new partners are truly in your child's best interest. Courts may restrict overnight visits, or limit your child's contact with a new partner, if they view your decisions as risky or harmful for your child.
Practically, this means being thoughtful about when and how you introduce a new partner, and about boundaries in your home. If your dating life appears chaotic or unsafe, it can become a major issue in your Texas child custody case.
8. Ignoring court orders and the 2025 Texas custody law changes
In many Texas counties, Standing Orders go into effect automatically when a Texas Family Law case is filed, and they have the force of a court order. During the case, the court may issue Temporary Orders and, ultimately, a Final Order, all of which you are legally obligated to follow.
Ignoring court orders is one of the fastest ways to lose parenting rights and face sanctions, fines, or even jail time. The 2025 changes to the Texas Family Code increased the emphasis on compliance with Protective Orders and on providing accurate information and required documents (such as certified birth certificates where available) at the outset of a case. Repeated violations of orders regarding possession, child support, or family violence can lead to contempt findings and major changes in conservatorship in favor of the other parent. Many attorneys will withdraw from representation if a client persistently disregards the court's authority.
Effective September 1, 2025, Texas implemented important changes to the Texas Family Code that affect custody, visitation, and child support, including a higher child support cap, expanded use of ESPOs, tighter standing rules for many non-parents, and additional documentation and affidavit requirements. Parents who assume the 'old rules' still fully apply risk making decisions about visitation, support, or third-party involvement that no longer align with current law. Working with a lawyer who understands the 2025 updates to the Texas Family Code can help you avoid costly mistakes and better position your case, especially in Denton County and Collin County Texas courts and other North Texas family law courts.
Conclusion: How to show the court you are the stable parent
These 8 mistakes are some of the most common ways parents weaken or lose their Texas child custody cases in 2026. In today's legal environment, especially after the recent changes to the Texas Family Code, courts are watching closely to see which parent consistently demonstrates maturity, follows orders, and keeps the child out of conflict.
Choosing to stay calm, avoid harmful behaviors, and seek guidance when you are unsure, sends a clear message that you are focused on your child's well-being. Demonstrating that you understand and respect these expectations is one of the most reliable ways to protect your time with your children and improve your chances of a positive outcome in your Texas child custody case in Denton County, Collin County, and throughout North Texas.
If you are facing a Texas child custody case and want help avoiding these mistakes, consider speaking with a Denton County or Collin County child custody attorney who understands the 2025 law changes and how local judges approach these issues.
Get in touch for your free consultation online or at (469) 384-7303!